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‘There were sheep, horses and a CROCODILE outside the stable’

Following are a few of the funniest and most endearing quotes from this article, but read it all for the full effects.

A recent survey revealed that one in three young adults had no idea that Jesus was born in Bethlehem. (…) So what do Britain’s youngsters really know about Christmas? (…) Four to nine-year-olds (were quizzed) at four primary schools in Britain to find out:

What gifts did the three wise men bring?

Jay, five, from Broomhill Infant School, Bristol:
“The three wise men brought Jesus presents of gold, frankincense, smurr [sic] and silver. But I think he would have preferred wrestling toys.”

Dominic, six, Merchant Taylors:
“I don’t know what the three wise men brought Jesus but I would have given him a tin of biscuits. I think Mary, Joseph and Jesus would have all liked a biscuit.”

What animals were there when baby Jesus was born?

Matthew, six, Merchant Taylors:
“There were sheep, horses and a crocodile outside the stable.”

Who was the Angel Gabriel?

Erin, six, Broomhill Infants:
“The Angel Gabriel is a big white fairy. He helped Mary and Joseph look after the baby – kind of like a doctor.”

Jay, five, Broomhill Infants:
“There was also an angel called Gabriel, whose favourite thing was to fly around all day.”

Millie, seven, Merchant Taylors:
“I don’t know who the angel is but I like Jesus.”

Who is Jesus?

Jay, five, Broomhill Infants:
“Jesus was a king and he wore a crown even though he was a baby. It was a really small crown.”

Antonia, seven, Merchant Taylors:
“Jesus is Mary and God’s little boy.”

Sara, seven, St James’ Primary:
“Jesus is a mystery man.”

Why do we celebrate Christmas?

Ellyshia, nine, St James’ Primary:
“I am not really a Christian. I believe in unicorns and pixies.”

Where was Jesus born?

Charlotte, six, Merchant Taylors:
“A long way away from Liverpool.”

Charlie, four, Broomhill Infants:
“He was born in a stable a long way away from here in another country. Bethlehem — it’s in England.”

Erin, six, Broomhill Infants:
“Jesus was born in the stable – it had lots of hairs.”

What did the wise men follow to find the stable where Jesus was born?

Hannah, seven, Merchant Taylors:
“They followed a special Christmas star, which is only out around Christmas.”

Who are his parents?

Charlie, four, Broomhill Infants:
“Jesus’s mummy and daddy are called Jovis and Mary.”

Ansel, six, Broad Oak:
‘Jesus’s parents were Gods.’

Archie, seven, St James’ Primary:
“His parents were Mary and Joseph. That’s easy because I was Joseph in the play.”

Antonia, seven, Merchant Taylors:
“Jesus’s mum and dad are Mary and Joseph and they were very happy with the king’s gifts.”


As to the title of this column — “OH, JINGLE BELLS, SHOTGUN SHELLS…” — I thought the lyrics to the song, “Jingle Bells” during several years of my earlier childhood went like this:

“Ohh, jin-gle bells, shot-gun shells, running all awaaaay,
Oh, what fun it is to run…”

Though I can’t be sure, I think this lyric mishap had to do with the fact that one of my best playmates’ father was a Sheriff. When I eventually, later learned the actual lyrics to the song, my whole appreciation for Christmas caroling changed.

Have a very, Merry Christmas. 305wde_ChristmasCarols

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